Lessons from Esther on the difference between influence and manipulation

Lessons from Esther on the difference between influence and manipulation

Last week we talked about the importance of giving before you get when it comes to leveraging our relationships through networking

This was something that Esther did with the King by throwing him 2 wine banquets before she so much as broached the subject of saving her people. Click here if you missed that, sis

Which is known as harnessing the law of reciprocity

Here’s the thing, though…

There is a thin line between harnessing the law of reciprocity and being manipulative

Which is yet another reason that networking gets the reputation of being icky and gross

Here are some key differences between the 2:

Lessons from Esther on what NOT to do if you want to network successfully

Lessons from Esther on what NOT to do if you want to network successfully

Networking is one of the best ways to increase your authority, your bank account and- most importantly- your impact.

You know,

  • That message that you want to share with the world

  • That legacy that you want to leave

  • The reason you believe God put you on the earth

That’s your impact or your “why”

However, networking is an art that not everybody gets right

Hence the reason that it gets the bad rep of being really icky and gross

Here are 3 things to avoid to ensure that you do, as demonstrated by Esther

Lessons from Esther on 3 Mindset Blocks that Impact Your Visibility Efforts

Lessons from Esther on 3 Mindset Blocks that Impact Your Visibility Efforts

If you’ve been rocking with me for a while, you’ll know that I don’t believe in visibility for visibility’s sake or for selfish reasons

That’s first thing’s first

I believe that visibility is a tool for making positive impact in the world and that maximum impact will require maximum visibility

Because, as stated in my post about why we shouldn’t feel bad about promoting ourselves:

  • We are called to solve problems

  • Your success, especially financially, correlates with the amount of people that you serve by solving their problems

This is just one of many mindset blocks that need to be removed to avoid self-sabotaging our own visibility efforts, though. For example…

The events of Esther’s life shows us that we also need to know the following:

Lessons from esther on how to increase your visibility by transforming your mindset

Lessons from esther on how to increase your visibility by transforming your mindset

In my previous post, I talked about Hegai (the King’s eunch’s) role in helping Esther secure the crown

Click here if you missed that, sis

But that wasn’t the main thing that made the King choose her

“So, what was?!” I hear you ask

According to Esther 2:15 and 17, it was favour
So let’s break that down

When I hear the word “favour” it immediately puts me in mind of the concept of grace

Why?

Because grace is by definition “the unmerited favour of God”

In other words…

Without the belief that:

  1. You have God’s favour

  2. He will cause people to favour you also

  3. He made you “for such a time as this”

You won’t go towards your goals or the desires that He gave you

Because we go in the direction of of our beliefs

We see that play out in Esther 4:10-11 when Esther expressed fear of going to see the king about calling off the proposed genocide of her people

And…

We see it in modern day stats that show that women feel less at ease going for their goals by promoting themselves than men- which in turn means that they're less likely to do it.

Can you relate, sis?

What needs to be understood is that walking in God’s favour is a lifestyle that is born out of your mindset. Here are 4 tools that I use to develop it.

Lessons from Esther on how to create relatable content

Lessons from Esther on how to create relatable content

Last week I mentioned that one of the things that we should be doing while waiting for our breakthrough(s) is seeking wise counsel from mentors

Rather than wallowing in discouragement

Esther is a prime example of this on at least 3 occasions. For example:

Esther 2:20

Which says “Esther had not revealed her people or family [before becoming queen], for Mordecai [her uncle] had charged her not to reveal it”

Esther 4:14

When she used her power, privelage and position as queen in service of her people at that same uncle’s behest.

But the specific passage that I had in mind when I mentioned this last week was Esther 2:15-18, which states that:

After their year of prep, when it was finally time for the ladies of the harem to meet the king “each young woman went to the king, and she was given whatever she desired to take with her from the women’s quarters to the king’s palace”. But-

When it was Esther’s turn to see the king, “she requested nothing but what Hegai the king’s eunuch, the custodian of the women, advised”

which was more than likely something more catered to the King’s taste than hers, helping her to secure the crown

This coincides with my previous post re what Esther teaches us about why we shouldn’t feel bad for promoting ourselves

Remember that, sis?

When it comes to promoting yourself through PR content is also king

Because it:

  • Positions you as an expert in your field

  • Increases your authority and credibility

  • Gives you a larger platform to share your thought leadership and message

  • Attracts your ideal clients

  • And more

Like Esther, though, we shouldn’t be approaching it thinking about how we can serve and elevate ourselves but how we can serve and elevate others (the people attached to the platform we are pitching)

Because your success, in life and business, correlates with the amount of people that you serve by solving their problems

The best way to achieve this?

Do like Esther…

Research, sis!

Lessons from Esther on what to do when you're feeling discouraged

Lessons from Esther on what to do when you're feeling discouraged

Last week, I talked about the fact that Esther is a popular woman of the Bible

Especially amongst the ladies that I have interviewed as guest experts within my Facebook group

This is because she used her power, privilege and position in service of her people

Reminding us as modern women that:

1. God made us for a purpose

2. We are called to solve problems

3. The problems you are called to solve will require using your gifts

4. Maximum impact will require maximum visibility

When thinking about Esther and her legacy it can be easy to forget all that it took for her to become so well renowned

For example, Esther 2:12 says that before she became queen she (and the other prospects) had to:

• Stay in the palace for a full year away from their family and friends

• Undergo beauty treatments

• Learn protocol etc

Before they even so much as a met the king, let alone got chosen to be his bride!

I say all of that to say, it can be easy to become discouraged in our own journeys

It can be easy to see what other people have achieved/are achieving and develop a mean case of comparisonitis

It can be easy to become discouraged at your (seeming) lack of progress

It can also be easy to feel things are taking too long

But Esther's story teaches us not to

In fact…

lessons from esther on why you shouldn’t feel bad about promoting yourself

lessons from esther on why you shouldn’t feel bad about promoting yourself

Within my Facebook group, Women of Influence, we have weekly expert interviews

We also discuss all things netowrking and PR here.

One of my favourite ways to end the interviews is by asking guests who their favourite woman of the Bible is and why

And whilst I’ve had a variety of facinating answers and testimonies…

Esther, without a doubt, takes the crown for the one that gets named the most

The scripute that’s most synonymous with her? “Yet who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?”

Found in Esther 4:14

A rallying cry that came from her uncle, Mordecai, to encourage Esther to use her power, privelage and position in service of her people

A word that not only confronted Esther with her significance and purpose but confronts us with our own because…

It also let’s us know that:

Lessons from Esther on how to go from trauma to triumph

Lessons from Esther on how to go from trauma to triumph

Do you believe in signs, sis?

I do. In fact, if you’ve been rocking with me for a while, you’ll know that-

God tends to speak to me in repetition. For example in my last blog post I said:

That let’s me know that this is a topic that needs to be explored further

“Unresolved personal trauma can thwart your purpose- especially in business. This is why it’s super important to find the source and cut it out at the root for the sake of healing”

Then I got confirmation of this via a post from my girl Destiny “The Prayerpist” Thomas: